Boarding the Bus of Life

I have been a longtime follower of medical intuitive Caroline Myss, purchasing both her books and audio workshops – and greatly appreciating her teachings and wisdom. And then C-jab happened. I received an email from her that linked to a video where she mocked those of us who questioned the jab science and safety, and told us to stop being so ridiculous and just get the darn shot.

I too have a large following of almost 200,000 people on my list – I would never presume to bully or ridicule them into a health decision, no matter how strongly I felt about it. During this whole palaver I have only urged my readers to connect to their intuition and their deep body wisdom and do as their own body/soul guides them. For those who asked my personal opinion, I set up a website with pertinent information. My entire family of origin got jabbed with no judgment or argument from me. And so I wrote to Caroline:

“I am utterly shocked that someone with your calibre of mind and intuitive development, could make such an uninformed pejorative statement against people who have researched extensively and do not believe the jab is safe. Are you completely unaware that over 50,000 medical doctors and PhD scientists have signed a declaration stating that the jab is not safe? You have obviously done no research to discover that this jab has the highest rate of adverse reactions of any vaccine in the history of humankind. So after denigrating my extensive research and highly developed intuitive sense, you are now going to teach me about personal power? I have been a big fan, supporter, and disseminator of your work for 20 years Caroline. I am deeply disappointed and saddened by your position.”

I did not receive a response and who knows if she even saw it, or whether it disappeared into the files of a personal assistant. I wonder how she feels about the jab now, with new negative information emerging almost daily, and the highest number of adverse reactions of all vaccines combined, since vaccination was first rolled out to children on this planet?

Don’t get me wrong, I am no stranger to this state of being. At age five I was kicked out of my birth country for not being black enough. I suffered the devastating loss of the land that felt the most like ME, and the animals I loved with all my heart and soul. I came to a new country where I was then too brown, but I did not shrink or make myself any smaller.

Curly, blonde haired Leif, 3 years older than me, decided he did not want a Paki sitting next to him on the school bus. So he told me to get out of his seat. I informed him that it was not his seat and I would not be moving. Over the next 45 minutes he tried every tactic he could think of to get me out of that seat. Including mustering all the leverage of the bus’ movement to catapult his body across the seat and slam into me, over and over, in an attempt to dislodge me. I held a vice grip on the back of the seat and both feet braced on the floor, staring straight ahead, along with the sheer determinism that he would not run me off like a mangy dog. He could not budge me. Did I enjoy being part of that experience for 45 minutes, with every eye on the bus watching me, judging me? No. But some hills you choose to die on, if you have to, because it’s more important than just staying alive.

I was almost 2 years younger than any member of my class, because I started reading at age 3. I never fit in and I didn’t care to. I am the only woman I know who has never been given a bridal shower, or a baby shower. I’ve never had many friends, and sometimes I’ve had none that lived in the same country as me. With the birth of my first child, I began my deep dive into the efficacy of vaccination. My three children remain unvaccinated and so I went through the hassle with schools etc. for the last 20 years.

I never tried to be part of my Indian culture because not only was I not brown enough, I did not agree with patriarchy and chauvinism. So you see, I have spent my entire life marginalized. I have never been one of the majority, or the popular group. I have always been the minority, the fringe, the outsider. And I’ve been quite happy to occupy that space. My sense of belonging has never come from acceptance by dominant groups. I have always looked for and found the good everywhere. But this is different. This time there is dread, deep unease, and often despair. And we’re all just so damn tired.

At the same time as being rejected by my birth country for not being black enough, and then being rejected by the next country for being too brown, I was simultaneously aware that I was Jewish enough for Hitler to have exterminated me. And thank God that time has passed.

Normally I am an optimist, and an adventurer. I have never defined myself by my race, or gender, nor have I accepted being defined by others. When my doctor told me I had an incurable disease, I left medical care and decided I would cure myself, or die trying. That’s the kind of person I am. I have since helped over 150,000 people heal themselves, using my methods. It is one of my greatest joys in life, to pay it forward. I write all these things only to make it clear that I have always, always lived outside the box. I have always been a fringe-dweller, and happily so.

Even now, I can understand peoples’ rabid-dog fear of viral infection and thus I would be OK to live off-grid, in an isolated community of just a few like-minded souls. I actually don’t need to be part of your groups, or your healthcare system, your schools, or your public life of concerts and sporting events. But I do need to have freedom of movement to travel to my ranch in my own private vehicle, to live in the climate I choose (which involves flying on an airplane), to purchase supplies. Right now, in Canada and the U.S., I have been barred from doing that for two years – basic human rights – because I am unjabbed. People think it’s all over now. Is it? Or is round 2 coming?

I will not go quietly. You do not get to have my seat on the bus. For the simple reason that it’s not right.